After being away from blogosphere for about 6 months, I have many topics that I wanted to talk (write) about. I don’t prefer to dump everything into a single post, and for this reason I will have them posted in separate entries. In this particular post, I just wanted to share a quick glance of what had happened in the past months (April to mid Sept) while I’m away.
I don’t know if anyone love to read my stuff here – most of it kind of personal – but here I am writing more stuff, still. I can’t commit to the regular or schedule-type of postings, so blog updates usually happen based on my mood; also knowing that my weblog here will remain active as long as I kept renewing my domain every year.
Prompt #4: “Write about a loss: something (or someone) that was part of your life, and isn’t anymore. The twist – Make today’s post the first in a three-post series.”
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PART 1: Lost Freedom of Choices
I skipped this prompt previously, primarily because my mind was so depressed by the loss I had a year ago. The painful memory teared me down, but I was lucky to get many wonderful supports from all around the world. I chose not to stress myself with the subject given and I finally gained the strength to go along with this challenge, with a slight twist to the story of a loss.
I woke up every day with the alarm clock hits the snooze button 3 times at bare minimum, spent relatively 12 hours at work with my eyeballs glued to the computer screen, plus the dreadful back and forth commuting. I returned home with tuckered veins, and the endmost thing to do was to stare at another laptop or television screen. Usual recurrent activities later includes: shower, dinner, house chores, and procrastination from exercising once the clock strikes 10 PM. Flipped a book about 3 pages and gambled to acquire quality sleep within 7 hours ranged. The sun rise again for the next day and the same cycle repeats. On day to day basis, it became collectively motionless, sluggish and mundane of ‘same old same old’ routines.
“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different?” – C.S Lewis
In between, as I let the ordinary days passed, I may have felt that I lost the freedom of time, and started questioning the importance of my existence into the world. All of us have that ‘in-between-mood swings-of-what-should-I-do-with-my-life’ kind of day. To keep myself motivated, I ‘stalked’ the life of these people – the successful, the rich, the kind, the perfect traits.